Monday, 17 October 2011
Comic Book Image of the day: Tuesday October 18
Sunday, 16 October 2011
Fight or Flight?
So I wrote this in 2008, and I have to say its probably the best thing I've written, but of course that's just my opinion. You may finish reading this and totally disagree and again that would be your opinion, but I have to say out of everything I have written (and there hasn't been much, trust me) this is the "piece" I'm most proud of.
-------------------
If you all travel on the TTC during the day then you would most likely pick up the Metro Newspaper. This publication is usually hit and miss, sometimes having great eye catching (but short) articles. Other times however you just skim through to the entertainment section, which is usually filled with juicy gossip. On Monday though a certain article did catch my eye, about a man named Michael Hayden. The article was good but scarce so i went online and find a better version of it through the Toronto Star news service.
A Jamaican police officer says he's living in fear after coming out as a Gay Man, and hopes to come to Canada where he can safely speak up on behalf of other Gay Jamaicans. Michael Hayden, who has been on the police force for four years, said other officers routinely attacked, and abused him after becoming suspicious of his sexual orientation. After speaking out publicly about the problem, in The Jamaica Star newspaper this month, the 24-year-old Hayden said he began receiving death threats."I want to stay here and fight," Hayden said, in a telephone interview from Jamaica yesterday. "But it's not safe for me. My life is in great, great jeopardy." Human rights groups say Hayden's case is the latest in a series of disturbing anti-Gay incidents in the Caribbean tourist destination. The Jamaican police force declined to comment on Hayden's situation. Sodomy is a criminal offence in Jamaica, which carries a maximum penalty of 10 years."We have no comment at this time," Karl Angell, a spokesperson for the Jamaican Constabulary Police Force said in a telephone interview from Jamaica yesterday.Hayden is not the first Gay Jamaican to seek asylum out of fear for his life, said Rebecca Schleifer, a researcher with Human Rights Watch in New York, and author of Hated to Death, a report on gay bashing and its impact on the fight against HIV/AIDS in Jamaica. Jamaica lost a key leader in the HIV/AIDS battle, she said, when gay activist Gareth Henry fled the country last month and sought refugee status in Canada. Henry had been co-chair of the Jamaican Forum for Lesbians and Gays and also a volunteer with Jamaican AIDS Support for Life .Henry, 30 told the Star yesterday that he started thinking about leaving Jamaica after being beaten by police a year ago on February 14th at a drugstore in Kingston, Jamaica. He says police deny beating him, and has said he's lost 13 gay friends since 2004, yet police refuse to acknowledge there's a problem, often blaming the dead victim's lover or other Gay Men."The situation for Gays and Lesbians in Jamaica is getting worse," Henry said in his telephone interview in Toronto, where he's now living. Henry said he feels for Hayden. "He's unsafe. They're hunting him daily. It's one of those very sad cases. For him coming out, he didn't want to be another person who died before he got to tell his story." Hayden is now on a leave of absence from his job and is in hiding while his allegations against his fellow officers are being investigated. Violence against Men who have sex with Men, ranging from verbal harassment to beatings, armed attacks, and murder, is pervasive in Jamaica, according to Schleifer's report for Human Rights Watch.The church denounces gay sex, popular music reinforces prejudices against gays and lesbians and police do little to stop violence against them, she noted.
My first reaction to this was " I really hope an organization here in Canada will make the effort in trying to protect him. Also "I hope the Canadian government grants him refugee status so he can come up here." Then I starting thinking was it the right time for him to come out and go public about his sexuality? I think what he was trying to do was very admirable, wanting to fight for the good of all Gay Jamaicans, but he must have known that right now his country doesn't want to hear it.
Its good to point out that Jamaica isn't the only place on earth that has these human rights issues. In fact in some places its even worse. Places like Iraq, where two young men where sentenced to death for being homosexual, and hung. This sentence was given by the Ayatollah, a strong Iraqi spiritual leader who states "Gays should be killed in the worst Way Possible."
Q: What is the judgment on sodomy and lesbianism?
A: "Forbidden. Those involved in the act should be punished. In fact, sodomites should be killed in the worst manner possible."
A quote taken from an Iranian cleric who was nominated by Iraqis for the 2005 Nobel Peace prize. Contradiction or what? I did find a reaction, and an opinion to these statements. I would like to first point out that this opinion doesn't directly reflect my own but I did find it something worth showcasing.
And I quote "Muslims in the West, and Homosexuals are both minority groups. So what? Muslims are violent, hate-filled killers who prey on Homosexuals. That is almost without exception.Christians often do not have any higher opinion of homosexuals than do Muslims. There is a fundamental difference: Christians generally don't kill homosexuals. Individual people might bash gays, and when they do we all press till the criminal is captured and prosecuted. It is the law that saves homosexuals from the few who would harm them; in Islam it is the law that kills homosexuals. Now, some homosexuals are too stupid to understand the difference, and they side with Muslims in their stupidity, thinking that one minority is the same as the next so long as both hate America and share a number of the same cliches." quite a mouthful!
In my opinion what seems to be the issue in these countries is how much religion plays a big part in government. Religion in most cases is law, inforced by people who twist those beliefs to fit their own goals and to place fear on others. For example Asama Ben Ladin, who took the muslim religion and twisted it, making it seem terrifying and making the western world think that's what being muslim is all about. Religion to me has no place in goverment. Goverment should be a democracy representing all peoples living in those borders, and peoples who's beliefs maybe different from the majority. "The church denounces gay sex, popular music reinforces prejudices against Gays and Lesbians and police do little to stop violence against them." This just proves that for those of us who want to fight its going to be a very tough battle. Sometimes staying quiet, and working behind the scenes is a better option. Regardless, some places in the world still have "alot of growing up to do."
-----------
So there it is. I'd like to point out that this was written in 2008, and if it was written today I have written it a little different..but there it is..hope you enjoyed
The two men hung in Iraq
-------------------
If you all travel on the TTC during the day then you would most likely pick up the Metro Newspaper. This publication is usually hit and miss, sometimes having great eye catching (but short) articles. Other times however you just skim through to the entertainment section, which is usually filled with juicy gossip. On Monday though a certain article did catch my eye, about a man named Michael Hayden. The article was good but scarce so i went online and find a better version of it through the Toronto Star news service.
A Jamaican police officer says he's living in fear after coming out as a Gay Man, and hopes to come to Canada where he can safely speak up on behalf of other Gay Jamaicans. Michael Hayden, who has been on the police force for four years, said other officers routinely attacked, and abused him after becoming suspicious of his sexual orientation. After speaking out publicly about the problem, in The Jamaica Star newspaper this month, the 24-year-old Hayden said he began receiving death threats."I want to stay here and fight," Hayden said, in a telephone interview from Jamaica yesterday. "But it's not safe for me. My life is in great, great jeopardy." Human rights groups say Hayden's case is the latest in a series of disturbing anti-Gay incidents in the Caribbean tourist destination. The Jamaican police force declined to comment on Hayden's situation. Sodomy is a criminal offence in Jamaica, which carries a maximum penalty of 10 years."We have no comment at this time," Karl Angell, a spokesperson for the Jamaican Constabulary Police Force said in a telephone interview from Jamaica yesterday.Hayden is not the first Gay Jamaican to seek asylum out of fear for his life, said Rebecca Schleifer, a researcher with Human Rights Watch in New York, and author of Hated to Death, a report on gay bashing and its impact on the fight against HIV/AIDS in Jamaica. Jamaica lost a key leader in the HIV/AIDS battle, she said, when gay activist Gareth Henry fled the country last month and sought refugee status in Canada. Henry had been co-chair of the Jamaican Forum for Lesbians and Gays and also a volunteer with Jamaican AIDS Support for Life .Henry, 30 told the Star yesterday that he started thinking about leaving Jamaica after being beaten by police a year ago on February 14th at a drugstore in Kingston, Jamaica. He says police deny beating him, and has said he's lost 13 gay friends since 2004, yet police refuse to acknowledge there's a problem, often blaming the dead victim's lover or other Gay Men."The situation for Gays and Lesbians in Jamaica is getting worse," Henry said in his telephone interview in Toronto, where he's now living. Henry said he feels for Hayden. "He's unsafe. They're hunting him daily. It's one of those very sad cases. For him coming out, he didn't want to be another person who died before he got to tell his story." Hayden is now on a leave of absence from his job and is in hiding while his allegations against his fellow officers are being investigated. Violence against Men who have sex with Men, ranging from verbal harassment to beatings, armed attacks, and murder, is pervasive in Jamaica, according to Schleifer's report for Human Rights Watch.The church denounces gay sex, popular music reinforces prejudices against gays and lesbians and police do little to stop violence against them, she noted.
My first reaction to this was " I really hope an organization here in Canada will make the effort in trying to protect him. Also "I hope the Canadian government grants him refugee status so he can come up here." Then I starting thinking was it the right time for him to come out and go public about his sexuality? I think what he was trying to do was very admirable, wanting to fight for the good of all Gay Jamaicans, but he must have known that right now his country doesn't want to hear it.
Its good to point out that Jamaica isn't the only place on earth that has these human rights issues. In fact in some places its even worse. Places like Iraq, where two young men where sentenced to death for being homosexual, and hung. This sentence was given by the Ayatollah, a strong Iraqi spiritual leader who states "Gays should be killed in the worst Way Possible."
Q: What is the judgment on sodomy and lesbianism?
A: "Forbidden. Those involved in the act should be punished. In fact, sodomites should be killed in the worst manner possible."
A quote taken from an Iranian cleric who was nominated by Iraqis for the 2005 Nobel Peace prize. Contradiction or what? I did find a reaction, and an opinion to these statements. I would like to first point out that this opinion doesn't directly reflect my own but I did find it something worth showcasing.
And I quote "Muslims in the West, and Homosexuals are both minority groups. So what? Muslims are violent, hate-filled killers who prey on Homosexuals. That is almost without exception.Christians often do not have any higher opinion of homosexuals than do Muslims. There is a fundamental difference: Christians generally don't kill homosexuals. Individual people might bash gays, and when they do we all press till the criminal is captured and prosecuted. It is the law that saves homosexuals from the few who would harm them; in Islam it is the law that kills homosexuals. Now, some homosexuals are too stupid to understand the difference, and they side with Muslims in their stupidity, thinking that one minority is the same as the next so long as both hate America and share a number of the same cliches." quite a mouthful!
In my opinion what seems to be the issue in these countries is how much religion plays a big part in government. Religion in most cases is law, inforced by people who twist those beliefs to fit their own goals and to place fear on others. For example Asama Ben Ladin, who took the muslim religion and twisted it, making it seem terrifying and making the western world think that's what being muslim is all about. Religion to me has no place in goverment. Goverment should be a democracy representing all peoples living in those borders, and peoples who's beliefs maybe different from the majority. "The church denounces gay sex, popular music reinforces prejudices against Gays and Lesbians and police do little to stop violence against them." This just proves that for those of us who want to fight its going to be a very tough battle. Sometimes staying quiet, and working behind the scenes is a better option. Regardless, some places in the world still have "alot of growing up to do."
-----------
So there it is. I'd like to point out that this was written in 2008, and if it was written today I have written it a little different..but there it is..hope you enjoyed
The two men hung in Iraq
Thursday, 6 October 2011
help
This is my favorite panel from a Comic Book ever (All Star Superman)...and I must say, that right now with everythings thats going on...I needed this ..
Tuesday, 4 October 2011
Breathe
* I posted this last week...but decided to take it off...upon reflection I have decided to re post it..
I do the STUPIDEST things sometimes! I mean really DUMB
Why do I keep engaging in self-destructive behavior....and for what???
This is not the person I thought I would be when I was 18...
I remember growing up and telling myself that I was worthless..to always just stay in the background where no one could see me. BUT when I turned 18 I decided to make a change. I decided that I deserved to find Love and to keep it.
But look where thats led me to...I sought attention from all the wrong places, and settled for GARBAGE
I gave in because I thought I couldn't find anything better...and all that did in the end was make me even more insecure, and crazy.
When it comes to Men I keep making the same old excuses
They don't know what they want
They are going through something in their lives
They aren't ready for something more
Somethings causing them to act this way
But I just say those things to make me feel better about the situation...And its not like I'm not to blame for some of it. I keep pushing, and pushing for their time..for them to acknowledge me, and that just makes me come off as annoying, and makes me seem selfish...The same could be said about my friendships..
I just wish they would make time for me in their lives without me having to ask them for it.
I use to be an atheist..but I found G-d in my early 20's ...but what good is finding G-d when you can't do right by him? If I'm such a good person, like I think I'am, why do I keep making the same old mistakes, over and over again??..I know that I'm an amazing person, and I know that I want to help others...but why can't I find my way?
To those who are in my life, and for those to come (and I don't just mean "Lovers") please if you LOVE me then don't just tell me..SHOW ME.
And if you don't want to be part of my life then have enough respect to tell me goodbye.
Be HONEST with me, because it would just be better in the long run..don't worry about hurting my feelings..better now than later!
I'm done...time to make a major change like I did when I was about to turn 20..only this time I'm hoping to do it better!
I love my friends, and I love my family, and I'm sick of loosing people ..and I hope I don't have to
I do the STUPIDEST things sometimes! I mean really DUMB
Why do I keep engaging in self-destructive behavior....and for what???
This is not the person I thought I would be when I was 18...
I remember growing up and telling myself that I was worthless..to always just stay in the background where no one could see me. BUT when I turned 18 I decided to make a change. I decided that I deserved to find Love and to keep it.
But look where thats led me to...I sought attention from all the wrong places, and settled for GARBAGE
I gave in because I thought I couldn't find anything better...and all that did in the end was make me even more insecure, and crazy.
When it comes to Men I keep making the same old excuses
They don't know what they want
They are going through something in their lives
They aren't ready for something more
Somethings causing them to act this way
But I just say those things to make me feel better about the situation...And its not like I'm not to blame for some of it. I keep pushing, and pushing for their time..for them to acknowledge me, and that just makes me come off as annoying, and makes me seem selfish...The same could be said about my friendships..
I just wish they would make time for me in their lives without me having to ask them for it.
I use to be an atheist..but I found G-d in my early 20's ...but what good is finding G-d when you can't do right by him? If I'm such a good person, like I think I'am, why do I keep making the same old mistakes, over and over again??..I know that I'm an amazing person, and I know that I want to help others...but why can't I find my way?
To those who are in my life, and for those to come (and I don't just mean "Lovers") please if you LOVE me then don't just tell me..SHOW ME.
And if you don't want to be part of my life then have enough respect to tell me goodbye.
Be HONEST with me, because it would just be better in the long run..don't worry about hurting my feelings..better now than later!
I'm done...time to make a major change like I did when I was about to turn 20..only this time I'm hoping to do it better!
I love my friends, and I love my family, and I'm sick of loosing people ..and I hope I don't have to
Saturday, 1 October 2011
Love? Reality?
Ok, ok, ok.. I know I said in my previous post that I wasn't going to uh...post, but somethings going around in my head and I just need to type it out..My English teacher says that when you write something down theres a better chance you wont forget it and have more of a connection to it...
So I was talking to a friend of mine about the subject of Love and he said...
"The person who you end up with in the end, marry, whatever isn't necessarily the person your in Love with or will ever be in Love with that its just "reality"
So thats it I guess...Love doesn't always win out in the end.. I guess I should just settle for something thats comfortable, and sacrifice the idea of being in Love with the man I end up with ...better then nothing right?
So I was talking to a friend of mine about the subject of Love and he said...
"The person who you end up with in the end, marry, whatever isn't necessarily the person your in Love with or will ever be in Love with that its just "reality"
So thats it I guess...Love doesn't always win out in the end.. I guess I should just settle for something thats comfortable, and sacrifice the idea of being in Love with the man I end up with ...better then nothing right?
Thursday, 29 September 2011
A conceit
Give me your hand
Make room for me
to lead and follow
you
beyond this rage of poetry.
Let others have
the privacy of
touching words
and love of loss
of love.
For me
Give me your hand
Make room for me
to lead and follow
you
beyond this rage of poetry.
Let others have
the privacy of
touching words
and love of loss
of love.
For me
Give me your hand
-Maya Angelou
Sunday, 25 September 2011
Saturday, 24 September 2011
IMU
We, unaccustomed to courage
exiles from delight
live coiled in shells of loneliness
until love leaves its high holy temple
and comes into our sight
to liberate us into life.
Love arrives
and in its train come ecstasies
old memories of pleasure
ancient histories of pain.
Yet if we are bold,
love strikes away the chains of fear
from our souls.
We are weaned from our timidity
In the flush of love's light
we dare be brave
And suddenly we see
that love costs all we are
and will ever be.
Yet it is only love
which sets us free.
-Maya Angelou
Some of us are afraid of love because of where it may take us. Some are afraid of love because it may take us to where we've been before. Ive never been one to be afraid, maybe I should be. Perhaps its you who should stop being afraid...
Following ones heart can get you in trouble..but sometimes not following your heart gets you nothing.. One day you'll wake up and realize you should have done it a little different, done it a little better..treated him like your heart wanted you to treat him..
I'm missing you like crazy ...Just wish things were different .. Maybe I need to be different.. Maybe we can be different together ...Maybe its too late, or maybe its just beginning..
exiles from delight
live coiled in shells of loneliness
until love leaves its high holy temple
and comes into our sight
to liberate us into life.
Love arrives
and in its train come ecstasies
old memories of pleasure
ancient histories of pain.
Yet if we are bold,
love strikes away the chains of fear
from our souls.
We are weaned from our timidity
In the flush of love's light
we dare be brave
And suddenly we see
that love costs all we are
and will ever be.
Yet it is only love
which sets us free.
-Maya Angelou
Some of us are afraid of love because of where it may take us. Some are afraid of love because it may take us to where we've been before. Ive never been one to be afraid, maybe I should be. Perhaps its you who should stop being afraid...
Following ones heart can get you in trouble..but sometimes not following your heart gets you nothing.. One day you'll wake up and realize you should have done it a little different, done it a little better..treated him like your heart wanted you to treat him..
I'm missing you like crazy ...Just wish things were different .. Maybe I need to be different.. Maybe we can be different together ...Maybe its too late, or maybe its just beginning..
Tuesday, 3 May 2011
All I ever wanted?
No I'm not returning as of yet, I just came across something interesting, and I didn't feel like waiting a week to post it. Now when I say interesting I mainly mean to me, because of the personal nature of it, and when it was written. I went on my Myspace page (yes I have one of those. No I hardly go on anymore, but really who does anymore? unless your a starving artist looking for your big break) and I found a list I made, back when I was 22. It was a list of things I wanted to achieve before I died, and I found it amusing, that some of the things on that list I still want, some are just silly, and some I don't see as important anymore ..so here goes..
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Feb 6th 2007 I decided to make a list (in no specific order) of what I want to happen in the future..What I want to accomplish, and hope will come to pass...I think in the future I'll want to make a few additions to that list...but I'm 22 and got a whole lot more too see and want ..(hopefully) but here it is now...
1) To have a family of my very own, husband..and yes im sayin it here..4 kids! I already got two names picked out...kai and jayla..
2)To become a facilitator going into different communities teaching youth about homophobia and racism..breaking down assumptions and stereotypes ( i need to work on that myself as well..no one is perfect)
3)To get into school and stick with it this time
4)To open a crisis center/community center for gay,lesbian,bi, transgendered youth dealing with anything from racism to drug addiction to just needing someone they can talk to
5)To star and direct my very own home made porn
6)To have my parents not just tolerate but accept my sexuality
7)Learning how to cook for my man and friends
8)Visit the Caribbean only cause Ive heard enough about it from the people ive been meeting these past few years (even tho i have been to the Dominican republic wen I was younger...)
9)Be part of something i believe in ...like a human rights protest
10)Let everyone know that they can come to me when they have a problem..and that i will do everything in power to help them ...even tho sometimes I need help too
11)Live to see the day when there will be a gay rap/hip hop artist that makes it to the mainstream
12)Make my man happy
13)See all my friends get married and have kids
14)Have a spiritual experience where I'am visited by my aunt who Ive never met
15)Hope that karma repays the one who broke my heart and played with the emotions of others
16)Become a sex symbol (I need to work on my abbs!!! and bad lol)
17)Make a documentary about racism in Gay culture today
18)Have sex on the beach
19)Get more tattoos, and piercings
20)Meet Ashanti and tell her how much she helped me threw a really rough period in my life
21)Pray more
22)See my children fall in love
23)To paint something huge and have it not suck
24)To be a go go boy for one night only
25)To keep reinventing myself every year
26)To finally be happy
27)To have multiple orgasms in a 6 hour period
28)Dry hump a celebrity of my choice (male of course)
29)To make a decent income
30)To never loose trust/faith in G-d again
31)Represent every ghetto Israeli out there!!!!
32)Visit Africa
33)To be a good,kind compassionate person for years to come
34)CENSORED
35)World peace
All I have to say to this is Wow. This was a real blast from the past, a time capsule if you will. I feel like I'm just now starting this list at 27, when I should have started at 22...I feel like my career path has also changed, mainly because I been threw some of these Gay organizations, and really didn't like the way they were runned. or the fact that Ive never really gotten any support from them. Whoa to (15) .. I have an idea who that was about, and I'm glad that Ive forgiven them, and wish I could have taken what I said back. I decided to censor (34) just because it was pretty personal, and to be honest I'm very much over it. It really doesn't bother me, anymore. While I haven't lost my faith in G-d since then, I defiantly have been putting my faith on the back burner. Only recently have I started to pray more, and talk to G-d (guess it took another crisis for that to happen). I have to say though that I'm still pretty proud at the fact, that with all the time that has past, my number one goal is to still have a family. Only now I would prefer 3 kids instead of 4...oh ya and I still want world peace..only I'm the ruling it, and I make everyone bow down to me.
I also found this interesting poem I wrote..
I feel like my whole world is falling apart, and I have no control over what is destined to become.
Everything has become a cruel joke, and the punch-line is too bitter.
I'm too close to the edge of the cliff, and I feel the wind beneath my fingertips.
It howls, and I listen with the hope it can drown out my screams.
The tear drops become the ripples in the sea, my reflection dashed away by the current.
With the rising mists I feel the coldness of my loneliness.
August 2, 2006 (which means right before I turned 22)
So I gotta ask myself this... WHAT THE EFF WAS I GOING THREW AT THAT TIME???
No seriously, its almost suicidal, which to be honest, I (foolishly) was thinking about from the ages of 20 to 22. I'm glad that Ive gotten stronger then this, and even though I get lonely sometimes, I handle it way better now,,,now if you excuse me I need to go over to my corner and cry.
heres Stewie being a very naughty boy..
Thursday, 28 April 2011
Wednesday, 27 April 2011
Tuesday, 26 April 2011
Monday, 25 April 2011
Amateur poetry night ..
So this Poem was written by a very dear friend of mine many years ago.. Shes been through her share of heart ache and has gotten through it all.. She is now very happily engaged.. You've come a long way baby ;)
I want to bend, I want to break.
I want to sleep and never wake.
Cut my wrists, and rip my heart.
You're the reason we're apart.
Can't live without you...
Ive tried, and tried.
Words can't express how much Ive cried.
I need my heart to survive.
Please come back, and keep me alive.
*Its probably best for the both of us if you don't come back...I'm jus sayin
Life is funny, you can make the same mistake twice, sometimes thrice ( I've always wanted to use the word thrice), and each time you learn something new about yourself. You even maybe learn the lesson you should have learned the first time. Sometimes, I think (in my case) I learn something, keep it with me, and then loose my way again, so it all comes crashing back, to remind me to keep moving. Only this time I should do it differently, and not give up. I know one thing though, G-d has a funny sense of humor... I'm jus sayin
I want to bend, I want to break.
I want to sleep and never wake.
Cut my wrists, and rip my heart.
You're the reason we're apart.
Can't live without you...
Ive tried, and tried.
Words can't express how much Ive cried.
I need my heart to survive.
Please come back, and keep me alive.
*Its probably best for the both of us if you don't come back...I'm jus sayin
Life is funny, you can make the same mistake twice, sometimes thrice ( I've always wanted to use the word thrice), and each time you learn something new about yourself. You even maybe learn the lesson you should have learned the first time. Sometimes, I think (in my case) I learn something, keep it with me, and then loose my way again, so it all comes crashing back, to remind me to keep moving. Only this time I should do it differently, and not give up. I know one thing though, G-d has a funny sense of humor... I'm jus sayin
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